Monday, January 03, 2005
i fixed the comcast problem myself. shows what they know.
off and on for awhile i've been feeling frustrated about a lot of things occurring or not occurring in my life. i can't specify most right now, but one that just happened again sticks out.
respect - it's a big thing with me, giving and getting. i wasn't respected growing up by my parents, peers and really just a lot of people in my life. for this reason, it has become of the utmost importance to me. unless someone has given me a reason, i do my best to respect them to the utmost, because that's what i want in return. now, of course, there are times when i do or say something that i don't realize will have an ill outcome, and i always feel bad about that - but i do my best to never ever consciously disrespect someone, even if they are horrible to me. so what gets me are two things: not being respected in return - and the person not seeing why this is a big deal, or that what they are doing is even disrespect, or not being given the chance to show someone respect because they automatically assume that i'm not going to. if you're going to assume that i won't and not even give me a chance, then i'm going to have words with you about why you're doing that - especially when i have a track record of respect.
i don't like feeling this impotently angry, but i am. it's infuriating.
and i wished i had never looked at New Year's pictures, either.