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    Thursday, September 05, 2002     12:52 AM

i'm feeling much crappier than i seem outwardly right now. i am so tired of people not listening to me, not remembering what i've told them, of reading into what i'm saying. and no, this is not just one person but quite a few of my friends and relatives. it's an unpleasant sinking feeling, the feeling that i really am more alone than i'd like to be.

i also feel like lately i've been compromising too much and i need to stop. i'm not going to get anywhere or assert myself if i don't start standing up for what i want and what's important to me.

trivially, i'm still bummed i won't be going to cruxshadows but at least i'll be going to Ascension and i encourage anyone in this area that likes gothy type music at least a little, to attend.

spent too much time getting businessy clothes for interviews and such tonight. not fun at all. not at all.

what i am tired of lately: seeing political signs in the yards of everyone in what seems like almost the entire state. i'm an independent, i can't even vote in the primary and i really don't care anyway. not thrilled with anyone that's running.

"so sad like a good book i can't put back..."


Tori Amos, Piece by Piece
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"It is time for me to walk the abyss. Time to reclaim my own. I must talk to the Morningstar. I do not have high hopes for the meeting."
-Dream, Sandman