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    Friday, May 31, 2002     12:19 PM

so much for writing every day, oh well. yesterday wasn't a great day and i hate writing when i think all i'll say is pathetic or unhappy. that's never good.

disturbed me to find that this journal is now in google's search engine. i was hoping to avoid getting listed in any kind of search engines so there'd be no chance my mother or anyone else would find the site. i can only hope since i don't use my full name anywhere she'll never find it. i'm hopeful since she's even uncapable of putting paper in a printer without help. yes, really, she is that technologically helpless.

as of late many people have pointed out my intelligence to me, which is flattering, though i don't really consider myself that smart. the weird part of that is the person i hear this from most frequently is someone i consider to be magnitudes smarter than i, and is who i referenced several days ago about me not being good enough. the not being good enough is only partly in regards to intelligence though, and i am aware that my thoughts on this subject are probably mostly illogical. being logical all the time is no fun though, is it?


Tori Amos, Piece by Piece
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"It is time for me to walk the abyss. Time to reclaim my own. I must talk to the Morningstar. I do not have high hopes for the meeting."
-Dream, Sandman